The tih Toy Store ;) LOL

The email conversation started out so innocently.  Baker replying "Something about them holding a paddle that makes me believe they believe they're in charge!" to a comment I made to her.
I replied "Yeah, we should burn all the paddles.  All us tihs should get together and have a large bonfire."

Which quickly went to what implements we had to burn.  Baker asked if I would burn the new carpet beater.  Oh, that beautiful, NASTY carpet beater.  YES, yes, if it would burn, I might try.  But that sucker is nylon covered galvanized steel.  All that would happen is that the nylon would melt down into the messiest, and probably smelliest pile of goo ever done at a bonfire, and the Duke would be left with nothing but steel... something that would be way more harsh on my poor bottom and would possibly mark the end of EsMay.  You'd all have to have a memorial for me, sad blog posts of remember when she did such and such a thing, and really, who wants to go to all that bother?  ;)

But, never fear, your trusty tihs are always prepared.  I kept sending joking replies, and Baker suggested I share them, and of course, I had to add some on. lol  (Did you know it takes blogger 5 times to realize I wanted to put tihs and not the word this???  Oh, silly auto correct lol)

So, ladies, we put our heads together to decide on how to dispose of every implement we own.  After all, our husbands really have been having way too much fun with them, and all at our expense too! ;)  It really is an unbalanced scale, don't you think?

So, loopies, of course every DD submissive out there wants to get rid of those darn loopies, don't they?  I sure do!  LOL  A horrible implement whose sole goal is to turn innocent little bottoms into quivering piles of raw ground beef.  Really, a cruel implement, that would be considered abusive if ever used on even the largest of animals, that any DD submissive who has had the great fortune to have never met one, should steer clear of at any cost.  They are the unwanted guest at any party, and the one everyone talks about with fearful tones.  So, how would we get rid of said implement?  Burning, like my dreaded carpet beater, would probably poison all the guests at our bonfire.  So we've decided to go into toys.  Yep, ladies, toys, respectable toys, for children. :)  Wouldn't that loopy you have look wonderful with a net sewn around the loop?  Just think of all the fish or butterflies a child could catch if there were able to use your dreaded loopy instead for a fun toy. :)

And what about those horrible silicone spatulas?  Children really do need to have safe versions of drum sticks, especially the younger children who are more apt to swing at something other than their pots and pans drums sets. 

Next we have the aforementioned carpet beater.  Why, it would be a lovely gift for a child playing house, or even better, could be a substitute badminton racquet or tennis racquet!  Think of how I could be blessing a child with endless hours of good old fashioned exercise.  It really is the children I'm thinking of here. ;)  (I'm hurt that some of you are doubting me) lol

Now, canes, dowels and the like are pretty easy to burn down if they're made of wood.  But what if you are one of the unlucky tihs whose HoH/Dom has subjected them to the evils of plastic?  Well, have no fear, just think of how wonderful a child would think it to have a wand to conduct an orchestra with?  Music, they say, is the key to all sorts of genius buried in our children.  Who are we to deprive our children of such opportunities?  Or maybe they could find their future career?  They could play teacher and use it as a chalk board pointer.  Every piñata needs a good stick to break it open with.  And if it has no grip, it would be a great practice toy for a child who eventually wanted to learn baton.  Races where one participant passes the baton to the next?  The ideas could be endless. :)

Plastic paddles could also be a problem for our toasty bonfire, which, on this cold night is sounding more and more pleasant.  lol  If you do indeed have a plastic paddle, and are good with a drill, just put a hole through the center, and attach a ball on an elastic.  Who didn't have one of those growing up?  Think of the hand eye coordination you could be helping a child acquire.  And if you're not good with a drill, any child would love to have a paddle to play paddle ball, or ping pong. :)  But wait, what if your paddle is of the longer and thinner sort?  Some children just do not do well playing baseball with a round bat.  It's just too hard for them.  Think of the self esteem you would be instilling into them to give them your flat paddle that would connects to beautifully with the ball. :)  The smiles, the cheers, aww, another happy child. :)

So ladies, care to join me as we all gather around a nice toasty bonfire while we make plans for our new toy store?  ;)  I'm ready for a new hobby. ;)  Anyone else?  hehe