Earning More Spankings - EEK!

I decided last Monday that it was a good day to get a week long stomach flu. :P  Oh my goodness, it was HORRIBLE!  I shouldn't say a week long one, there was one day, day 6 I believe, where I felt a bit normal, but other than that, I was miserable.  I got it from my best friend, and I'm such a good person, I decided to take down my husband, daughter, sister and father. :P  See, I know how to share. :P  (Wrote this last night and woke up with a very upset stomach today, eek, it's the flu that won't quit)

So, this is a post I started before I got sick that I will finish up. :)  I think you will like the Duke's words at the end. :)

Either I'm acting up more, or the Duke is getting more particular about how obedient he wants me, because I earned another spanking.  No, no bratting was involved.  But a bad decision and a poor memory were.

I want to have a girls night in the near future, but my sister was visiting me as well on the night that worked for my friends (this is also where I caught that dreaded flu).  Without thinking, I said the Duke could help look after my sister's children.  I never do that.  I never offer up the Duke to do things without checking with him first.  I am not sure, even to this day, if he was more shocked, or upset with the fact that I did that without asking him.  But I earned a spanking.

I told him I was sorry.  Then I said "I'm not saying sorry anymore, because you only spank me harder when I say it!"  He laughed, a full belly laugh that I have never seen in anyone else but the Duke.  Then I was blubbering, saying "I'm so sorry, no, I mean, not sorry, augh, I'm so sorry.  I'm sorry."  I was so pathetic. lol

He asked me if I'd had enough.  I said yes.  He asked if I really had, or if I was just trying to get out of the punishment.  I told him I really had.  And said that probably 10% of me was saying it to get out of any more spanking, but that I really had learned my lesson.  And then I was spanked again!  Harder than before.  It didn't end.  I was so thankful when he told me to get up on the bed.  He said there would have been corner time if I hadn't sprained my ankle just an hour before hand.  I didn't think anything of it, but I do today.  He's started using corner time the past few weeks after a spanking, and it's amazing to me how unaffected I feel today compared to any spankings lately.  I think the corner time is really helping me focus afterwards and to walk away with the right mindset.  Great, now I have to go and share that with him.  Good thing he's insisting on approving of my posts now. lol

So that was one spanking.  Another time, the day the Duke's brother and father were visiting, I wanted to have all of my work done before 1pm.  I asked the Duke to hold me accountable.  But then I wasn't feeling very well, and used it as an excuse to be lazy.  I finished at 3pm.  The Duke reminded me that I asked him to hold me accountable for every minute.  Freak, really?  What was I thinking????  I earned 120 spanks for 120 minutes late.  I got a bit upset while cleaning too, and said the sh.... word... yes, I did. :(  That bad attitude and swear word earned me 50 more spanks.  Now, before  you think he's a brute, and abusive, he did go a bit too easy in the beginning, just to make sure I could get through it all.  He switched implements every 20 spanks.  I didn't have a mark on me afterwards, which I actually found surprising, and to be honest, a little disappointing.  There just is something about carrying around a bruise from a hard spanking.  Right? ;)

So, all of this has me going down some interesting thoughtful paths on submission.  There is also a book the Duke and I are going to read on submissive lifestyles, and a 30 day email program on submission that I will actually do over a few months because of all the reading and podcasts they have.  I think I'll share some of my thoughts on it here. :)  I'm hoping that today is the first day of many good days of good health.  I really have missed being here.  I'm going to be spending time learning more about submission, and look forward to sharing some of what I learn with you all, in the middle of all the real life stuff going on. :)

The Duke's Deductions: 
I love EsMay, and although it may seem counter-intuitive, sometimes a spanking is what she needs. Yes the spankings are painful physically, but I have realized if I let too many things slide or go too easy on her, that can be more painful emotionally. It can send a message that I don't care if I don't keep up my end and spank her when it is justified. Also I feel that as this long sickness has lasted on in our family, that I have become lax in my HoH-ing. I am still not 100 % right now but I am looking for ways I can continue to try to be strong for EsMay and for ways to lead in our marriage.

Oh, he's already making up for us being sick.  He gave me a reset last night because I was acting a bit lost and completely overwhelmed with a problem I was facing.  Ouchie, and oh thank goodness. :) :)