Seducing Consent?

I saw this quoted on another blog a few days ago from a few years ago.

“The number one job of the dominant is to continually seduce consent from the bottom.”
― Joseph Bean

I do not know who the author of this quote is, I'll have to look him up sometime, but man, does it ever have me thinking and pondering.  It is on THIS BLOG in comment number three if you're looking for it. :)

Many of you already know what I say here, I'm just examining it further, and for people getting into DD or D/s, it's stuff I wish I'd known more of in the beginning. :)

What does the job or role of a dominant look like to you?  As many of you know, I'm trying my hand at novel writing, and in working through the characters, I came up with a line that I'm just loving from the male lead.  "I may control the wheel, but you control the brakes."  He's telling her in this scene that he may decide when she needs to do something, he might look like he's the one in control asking her to do things that test her limits, help her feel her submission, to test her obedience, and so forth, but that only happens as far as she lets it.  At any point, she gets to say no.  They can only go as far as she allows, and in that, she has the ultimate control.  She decides what does and does not happen.

So coming upon this other quote from above just really struck me as deeper than it first appears.

The Duke's job is to guide me, but if I buckle down and decide not to let him, there is little he can do to force it, and at that point it would be abuse.  Let me tell you, the Duke has not an abusive bone in his body, even getting into DD was a huge thing for him.  He's very passive in many ways.  So he seduces me.  Not just sexually, but he calls to my submissive side.  He lures it in, whispers to it, demands of it, dances teasingly around it, and calls it to him. 

I long for his seducing of my consent.  I love to have him push my limits in my submission, and feel myself sink further into our roles.  Every time he pushes, I stop, not to disobey, but needing a few seconds to feel that war in me.  Can I go this much further?  Can I submit on a new level?  Can I allow him to control me that much deeper?  And I love the war in me, the deep craving need to submit, to be owned, to please, against the embarrassment, slight fear of the unknown, and the tightening in my chest.  As I look into his eyes, I see what he expects, and he's putting his trust in me to obey, to let him guide me into things I do not know, to allow him to control how we go about this and how far.  He's trusting me to bend to his will, and as long as he's trusting me to let him lead,  trusting me to trust him, I can follow, I can trust in return and let go.  In this moment, I can do things I normally couldn't.  He seduces me to delve further than I normally could comfortably go.

I can stop it all.  I can, it's my choice.  Each step we take is further to being his, to submitting deeper, and I can decide I've gone as far as I'm willing and wanting to go.  Oh, but I don't want to.  I want more.

As the Duke pushes further, as I give him more and more of me, we grow.  We become more one than I ever thought possible when I said my wedding vows.  I insisted on putting the word "I will follow your leading" in my wedding vows.  I always wanted this type of marriage, I just didn't have a name for it for over 4 years, and when I did, I finally brought my desires to him.  I'm so glad looking back, that even in my marriage vows, I promised to obey.  Things aren't perfect, we're struggling right now as the Duke deals with self esteem issues.  But I sit here, and wait, knowing deep inside that he's working on seducing that side of me again, to giving into him, and giving him consent.

Dominance and submission is such a beautiful dance.  And in seducing me, the Duke wins me over, again and again.  I can't wait for him to read this one. :)

Side thought, I would have SWORN to you I said obey in my vows, as that was my intent, but after a lot of thought, I changed it to following his leading because I worried he'd be judged for that.  I forgot that until I just looked at our vows now.  I never even thought of that when picking my blog name.  How appropriate to promise in my vows to following his leading, and then naming my blog submitting to be led.  SOOO cool! :)