It's so late, and I'm falling asleep, but I feel I need to share about tonight. I got off work early, and when we came home, I was a bit despondent. My husband asked why, but I couldn't even really share. I'm sure it looked like sulking, and maybe deep down that is what it was, but I really couldn't think of what to say.
My husband and I may need to move, and I told him about an apartment I'd been told about, literally across the street from where we work! So convenient, and it'll allow us to keep our cats. No more half hour drive just to get to work, or get back home. But he panicked, and I tried to be patient, but had a hard time. Also, I feel like we're just playing at DD up until now. I tell him when I've been bad, and then have to remind him to punish me.
But I finally was able to talk about it a bit later tonight. I got him to read MustBeCrazy's post for today. We talked about it, and he realizes that I need consistency. That when I don't have that, I feel unloved, and not worth his time and effort.
So we sat down and talked about some rules I should have. We started out small, but things I really struggle with. Callie talked the other day on her blog about being electronic free from 10am to 1pm every day to do housework. We had been trying to figure out a way for me to work well at house work, and decided we liked how they put it. So tomorrow and every week on the first day of my weekend, I am to have no electronics for those three hours and am to busy myself with housework.
I also struggle with my weight. I wrestle with a disease that made me fat, and makes it over two times harder to lose weight than someone without the disease. I've managed to not put on weight this year, which is a huge triumph, but I want to LOSE weight. I want to lose 100lbs in fact. So we started two new rules. At least 2 hours of hard work outs a week, and only one small treat a day, and in a month, it will be only a treat a week. If I eat more than one treat in a day, I have to go without supper and with a spanking. The supper part was my idea, the idea of going the night that hungry really bothers me, especially since I wrestle with low sugars. My husband agreed so long as I don't get in danger of passing out.
Then he paddled my bottom good for having two peanut butter muffins today. He started out with a warm up, and then spanked me a good 40 - 50 times with the bath brush. It hurt, but not afterwards. So he did another warm up and another 40 or so with the bath brush. Still, no after burn... really, what are my buns made of?!?!?! So we wrestled around for a bit, and then he tried to spank me hard with his hand 20 times, now that actually stung since the skin was already spanked before, and even now it's still sensitive, but no burning.
Then we wrestled a little longer, and he grabbed my hands tight, put them around his neck, and I couldn't get free.
Husband: "See, you love me so much you can't keep your hands off of me."
Me: "Yeah, you wish!"
Husband: "You love me so much you have to have your arms around me all the time!"
Smart.... butt! lol I love that man. I needed that spanking tonight, I need to look at food differently. I need to eat less bad stuff. I need to learn to make better choices. I need to begin exercising again more regularly. I broke a toe this fall, and that got me off my normal exercise regime, and I desperately have to get back. I hope to be back to at least 40 minutes a night 5 nights a week soon.
So that is tonight. A lot of promises made on both sides, well not so many as in so important I guess. I pray we can stick with them! He really does not want to give up on DD, but I told him it needs to be a way of life and not just when it's fun so that I get the balance. After an hour of talking tonight, I think he really sees that's true.