Happy Anniversary, Duke :)

This week we have been married 11 years.  First of all, I'm pmsing.  Not to complain, or tell God how to do His job or anything, but shouldn't there be some rule about having your cycle on your anniversary?  Like, as in, it's not allowed to happen?  Just saying. :P  

I don't share my faith on here often, you come here to read about my marriage, and how we live our dynamic in it, and I want to respect that.  But being our 11th anniversary, I want to share a story with you because the number 11 is very important to me when it comes to our marriage, and sharing the reason why means sharing about a prayer I had many years ago, and how it was answered. :)

Two decades ago, *GULP* does that ever make me sound old, but there it is, two decades ago I was in my dorm room, alone, crying.  I wanted to be married so bad.  I wanted a man that would love me, lead me, spank and correct me when I needed it, (yes, I knew from about 19 I wanted this type of marriage).  I wanted all that, but all I prayed for was a man that loved me to marry me because I honestly didn't think I could ask for the rest.  I told God I didn't need to have my husband right then, but that I was so lonely, and could He just send me a sign that said I would be married someday, no matter how far away.  Many friends of mine loved the time of day of 11:11, it meant nothing to me, but every time they would call it out, I'd look at the clock and it would be 11:12.  It had happened earlier that very night even.  So, I asked God that if I was going to marry someday, to please show me 11:11 on the clock the next day.

Now, please don't think I do this kind of thing often.  In fact, I think it is the only time in my life I asked God for a fleece prayer (asking God to show through a physical sign how He will do things).  I forgot about it the next day, to be honest.  Like, it didn't even enter my head at all.  I had a paper I had to write and I had to get to it, and that was my only thought.  All the sudden, as I'm writing, someone threw a snowball at the window, I went to see who wanted me, but they hit the wrong window and wanted the person in the next room.  I sat back down again, wondering if was lunch time yet.  11:11 stared back at me from it's little box at the bottom right of the computer screen, and all the sudden I was transported to my prayer the night before.  I couldn't move.  I was just in awe.  That night, again, 11:11 came without warning and stared me in the face while in a mini van.  Over the years, when I would doubt, 11:11 started showing up everywhere as a reminder.  And then, about 7 years after I prayed, I met the Duke and we became friends.  Two years after that, after late night computer chats, and hanging out, we started dating.  A year later, and we were married. :)  About a decade after that prayer alone in my dorm room.  To this day, I love seeing 11:11 and being reminded of God showing His love to me through answering that.

So, this is our 11th anniversary, and it has been so special.  We hit a really hard time this summer, and I questioned a lot of things.  I even wondered if we'd make it.  But we've come out the other side, so much stronger, and so much more in tune with each other.  Now, my bottom may not love it as much, lol, but I sure do.  I currently sit on a sore bottom, but just as I was hoping last night, all the guilt is gone from what I was carrying this week.  We had a lovely time of connecting afterwards, and the Duke has been smiling since.  I told him it was because I sucked his.... afterwards, *blush* and he said "Yep" with a cocky grin. lol  (I don't usually share that much intimate info, hope I didn't shock anyone.) :)

So thankful we're back on again.  Not all marriages need DD, most don't, even ones that thrive with it.  We have found though that our marriage needs it.  Without it, I get forgotten, and most of the responsibility shifts to me.  I don't do well with all of it.  I can do a lot of responsibility, but with daughter, parents moved in, job, house, bills, health issues, etc, I can't do it all.  I need one person in my life to notice me and help me with my needs.  I meet his, and now he's meeting mine again.  He's seeking me out again, checking on me, stepping in when I need it, and just showing me so much love and that he has me.  I love him so much. :) So even though I didn't pray for the spanking and leading when asking for a husband, I still got it.  I got it all.  This was the best anniversary yet.  No gifts, no cards.  Still recovering and so behind, and it was still the best anniversary yet. :)

Duke, thank you for choosing me, thank you for chasing me, even when I didn't want you to at first all those years ago. ;)  Thank you for loving me, and figuring out this crazy ride of DD and D/s and the rest with me.  Thank you for fighting for our marriage, and most of all, fighting to do right for me so that I feel cared for.  I love you so much.  Here's to many more anniversaries together.