Thursday, December 19, 2013

1 Year - From The Duke and EsMay

Today is one year since I started this blog.  A year since we were starting out in DD, and I thought that it was stupid to start a blog, and that everyone would think I was being some kind of poser trying to work my way into a group that I didn't belong in.  I am so thankful I was wrong, and that this blog became a safe place to let out all I'm thinking.
 
The Duke and I did not get a chance to plan a post like we'd planned.  We got storm stayed for two nights with friends giving us no chance to work on this, and then we came home to a driveway full of snow.  So we decided to ask each other a few questions, making sure not to ask the ones you guys asked of us that we will answer tomorrow. :)  My words are in pink, his in blue. :)
 
So, Sweetie, what do you wish I had done differently this year in learning the DD lifestyle? What ways have you been disappointed in me? Been proud of me?

I don’t think there is anything I wish you had done different this year. I could say follow the rules more but you already follow the rules pretty well and besides I wouldn’t get to spank you as much otherwise. Maybe stop trying to take control back as much. I don’t really feel I’ve been disappointed in you at all. Maybe that I need to remind you of your bedtime every night otherwise you don’t go to bed on time. I have been so proud of you that you have been so submissive this year. I have been so proud of how you are so willing to submit to your spankings even though I know you find them painful at times.

Here is a question for you: How do you think our relationship would be different this year if we had not tried DD?

I think that may be the scariest question you could ask me. 13 months ago I wrote a counselling group, telling them I had no idea how to save my marriage, and I was at the end of what I knew how to do. I felt so unloved, and lost and alone. I don’t know that we would have had a relationship anymore if we had not started DD. Not that I would have left, we both know as much as I may have wanted to, I never could have, but... I would have wanted to, and in my heart, would have. We were on our way to roommates without a lot of love, and I can’t even begin to imagine what that would look like now. I am so thankful that we don’t have to know what we would have been like this year without DD.  I am so thankful that now, we are like we were when we were dating, but better.  More in love, more free, more fun. :)

What about this year surprised you? About me, about yourself, or about us together?

I think I was surprised by how well the spankings actually seemed to work. I thought spankings were for children, or were only for erotic play maybe. But they actually caused you pain and made you want to be submissive. I am surprised by how submissive you actually want to be, as I had always assumed from the prior years in our marriage that you really wanted to be the one in control. I am surprised by myself by how much I was able to step up in small ways since I always believed I was more of a follower. I am surprised by how closer and how much better we seem to work together now in our marriage than before we started DD.


Here is another questions for you: What do you think our relationship is going to look like a year from now with DD in it, especially if we have a baby with us?
 
Well, if God blesses us with a baby, I think we could picture it all we want... that little bundle will throw all our theories out of the window... if they're like any other babies I know. lol.  As for DD, I hope we're stronger.  I hope I remember to submit more often without you needing to remind me.  I hope that I can encourage you more and show you that I will not be upset if you become more consistent.  I know we will be even more in love, and have grown even closer together.  I think that is what this path has taught us, to keep working at everything, TOGETHER.  And I can't tell you how special it is to me that you're so willing to work along side me now.  {{{HUGS}}}
 
Tomorrow we'll answer your questions, so you still have time to ask one if you haven't already. :)  And maybe this weekend we'll actually sit down and do the post we meant to, but no promises, it's a pretty busy time of year. :)  I also have to get to the comments you guys left this week, have not had time, sorry.

12 comments:

  1. This is so sweet, I love it. I'm so happy for the two of you, and i can't wait to see what the next year has in store. I wish you all the best, I hope you have a fantastic Holiday, enjoy your time together! I love how close and connected the two of you are :) Yeah!

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    1. OH Jennelle, thank you, your words were so kind and hopeful, and really mean a lot to us. :)

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  2. Awesome post! It sounds like the two of you are pretty much connected and day to start the new year :) congratulations on one year!!

    Callie

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    1. Callie, I hope we're connected and ready for the year a head. I feel big changes coming, and not sure why, but know that we're better able to handle them together than we were this time last year. :)

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  3. Congratulations on your one year blogiversary Es May. I am so happy that I've got a chance to know you better and through you and your blog gotten to know your Duke a bit. I think you two are doing wonderfully and are a lovely example for others in blog land.

    Wishing you an awesome second year in blogging and DD. ;)

    Blessings...Cat

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    1. Cat, thank you, I have loved getting to know you too, and glad you got to know the Duke some too, he is one of my favourite topics, lol. :)

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  4. Congratulations on your first blogiversary Es May and Congratulations to you both on your first year of DD. I really enjoyed reading this. I love both of your answers and it's a wonderful reflection on your first year.

    I'm so happy that you have become so wonderfully connected and are in such a good space. It has been a honour and a privilege to follow your journey and witness how far you have come.

    I too am so glad I have got to know you and agree with Cat that you are a wonderful example for others.

    Wishing you all the very best as you embark on your second year :)

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. OH Roz, you humble me with your words, thank you. And I am not sure what you and Cat see in us to be an example, but if we can help anyone out there... all the struggles we went through would be worth it. :) Well, I guess they are worth it either way as they have helped unite us. Thank you for everything this year Roz, you have helped me so much. {{{hugs}}}

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  5. I am so glad for you both Es May. Congratulations on one year of DD, your blog, but most of all congrats to both of you for the repair that has been made in your marriage.

    love
    sara

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    1. Thank you, Sara, I never thought of it that way, but that is a great way to put it, it repaired our marriage. :)

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  6. congratulations and happy blogversary! this was sweet post. I love that he blogs with you. good luck on the bundle of joy :-)

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    1. Coral, it doesn't always happen, and he's only done a few posts himself, but I LOVE it when he'll write on here. :)

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Please feel free to leave any comments, but I do ask you to be kind. We go into this with eyes wide open after months of prayer, and a peace in our hearts that this is the right choice before God for our marriage. I am open to questions from those who wonder why we made this choice, but I would ask for no personal attacks. Thank you. :)

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