tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post7927594905888656425..comments2023-06-13T11:57:48.024-03:00Comments on Submitting To Be Led: It's About BalanceUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-14507814258711780972013-07-26T09:23:36.578-03:002013-07-26T09:23:36.578-03:00Yeah, I liked what Cat sent me, and am going to se...Yeah, I liked what Cat sent me, and am going to see what else they have and see what the Duke think's he'll like on me. :)<br /><br />I hope that Submissive Saturday goes well for you. :) I know that whole days set aside to it can be challenging, but usually very rewarding, especially if it helps form a habit you can continue with, either you or him, or both.:)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-10383042234069997252013-07-26T09:22:03.149-03:002013-07-26T09:22:03.149-03:00Hormones, oh how they plague us at times. lol
It...Hormones, oh how they plague us at times. lol<br /><br />It is hard to remember that submission is to be done without leading. I guess it's harder because we have to be more deliberate about it when someone isn't there taking the lead. Something I'm determined to work on. ;)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-63095186646042901092013-07-26T09:20:31.828-03:002013-07-26T09:20:31.828-03:00Yes, it does take a lot to realize we both need to...Yes, it does take a lot to realize we both need to realize, and we both need to not dismiss what the other says. We're learning a lot, and the Duke is actually listening to me now. It's wonderful. As you know, I've spent a lot of time pondering on how to be submissive, with or without the Duke's leading. I've come to some intesting conclusions, and still pondering them. I think I'll write about them in the next week or so if I have them more organized in my head. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-31785701291683578912013-07-26T09:18:22.511-03:002013-07-26T09:18:22.511-03:00I was looking the brush over, the wood is quite gr...I was looking the brush over, the wood is quite grainy compared to the other one I have. So that might be the problem, or it could be the finish.<br /><br />You're right, we all seem to understand differences in tastes of food, colour, favourite animals, but when it comes to what makes us happy or sad, it seems so hard for people to understand sometime. I do feel a lot better now that he sees we can be hurt by different things, and that's okay, and it is very real.Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-15289070121022289342013-07-26T09:15:59.009-03:002013-07-26T09:15:59.009-03:00Thanks, Willie. The Duke read your comment and to...Thanks, Willie. The Duke read your comment and took it to heart. He said he's going to think about it, and if we do keep it, it'll only be for warm up OVER clothes. In the mean time I'm going to look around more for a good wooden hair brush that won't cost as much as a car payment. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-23035411292039235442013-07-26T09:14:21.516-03:002013-07-26T09:14:21.516-03:00LOL Yep, they did say I should go first. I'd...LOL Yep, they did say I should go first. I'd be willing to give a lesson or two, as long as my pants stayed up! LOL The more you guys talk about dresses, the more I want to get one. I'll have to take another look around. :) <br /><br />And Oih, these vitamins should help in the end, but you are right, the hormones until there, wow. They really can mess you up. :) And it's been a good week for finding little ways to submit. I'm amazed at how many ways there are. I'll have to share some of those things in a post soon.:)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-53611059062755499892013-07-26T09:11:19.009-03:002013-07-26T09:11:19.009-03:00I have thought of starting with nightgowns, but I ...I have thought of starting with nightgowns, but I have a really hard time sleeping without shorts and a tshirt, even if I go to a tanktop, I can't sleep for some reason. So maybe if I start with dresses in the day, I can get my body used to them for night time.;) I do hope to find a couple dresses. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-12557008267971672892013-07-26T09:08:28.124-03:002013-07-26T09:08:28.124-03:00Missy, I think I do understand. I have done a lot...Missy, I think I do understand. I have done a lot of pondering over submission, enforced or not, this week. About how I can be accountable to being who I should be, with or without reinforcement. Still processing. ;)<br /><br />I'll have to keep looking for a dress, you all make them sound so desireable. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-21725279730337023272013-07-26T09:06:40.892-03:002013-07-26T09:06:40.892-03:00Those are cute. I liked the flowered one in the m...Those are cute. I liked the flowered one in the middle of the second link you sent. :) I'll have to see if they'll ship to Canada, and if the Duke is okay with them. :) Thank you, Cat. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-59025586365243913322013-07-26T09:03:10.618-03:002013-07-26T09:03:10.618-03:00He really is. Sometimes when I'm emotional, I...He really is. Sometimes when I'm emotional, I lose sight of that. But mostly, I really do know how blessed I am. :)Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-40341451065386894532013-07-26T09:02:23.064-03:002013-07-26T09:02:23.064-03:00It is amazing how that works, isn't it. :) I&...It is amazing how that works, isn't it. :) I've heard that so many times. Be the change you want to see in someone else.Es Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15862166523815621955noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-2000709893837962362013-07-25T10:23:44.343-03:002013-07-25T10:23:44.343-03:00I was going to say the same thing about target. Th...I was going to say the same thing about target. They have some cute dresses sometimes :) <br /><br />That is a good plan, to try to stay submissive even while not being led. I struggle with that balance too. This Saturday will hopefully be a submissive Saturday that works.. We will see. <br /><br />Good luck :) elle :)https://www.blogger.com/profile/15832857681848198913noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-3531202408377549022013-07-24T21:01:12.645-03:002013-07-24T21:01:12.645-03:00Haha - I would maybe go first :)
I have noticed i...Haha - I would maybe go first :)<br /> I have noticed in a lot of me and Z's hardest times that if I look at the calander...it was because of my hormones. Some our our craziest "episodes" have been while I was on PMS...I have anxiety and get super crazy and I can't sleep at all.... I finally put two and two together after about 6 months. <br /> Long talks are hard...we have had the kind where we are both crying and loving eachother so much but it hurts to get everything out.<br /> That little bath brush looks evil...perfect for quickies and the sit spots. <br /> And you are right...submission is OUR job...you are right. Sometimes I base it on how Z is acting...and I realize that i'm only responsible for myself. Even if he were never dominant or led me the RIGHT way...I'm still responsible for the way I treat him and others. Good post sweetie!Ashleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00797273349419240025noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-8568541472298972842013-07-24T18:20:25.578-03:002013-07-24T18:20:25.578-03:00Hey EsMay,
My thoughts to your post are just a bi...Hey EsMay,<br /><br />My thoughts to your post are just a bit different as I identified with what happened in your conversations you shared. Hubby and I had experienced that same thing - where he would tell me not to let things hurt or upset me and I would tell him that I didn't have a switch to turn off my feelings just because he told me to and that my feelings were still valid. Then when I would tell him I just need him to listen, I'd get nothing back from him and would end up more hurt & frustrated than I was before.<br /><br />It took us a while to find that balance of him listening and maybe helping me be able work through or let go of things and yet not dismissing my feelings, and also me not dismissing his advice just because I thought he didn't understand me. (We'd had many "It's Not About The Nail" type conversations, lol.) <br /><br />Our poor husbands - we just don't make sense to them sometimes....add in those extra hormones and yikes! And zits, lol - I can totally sympathize with you - oh those child bearing years are so much fun! - but so worth it too. :)<br /><br />I'm so glad that you and the Duke had that time and that he was able to come to understand you better. And that he immediately treated you to a 10 swat mini spanking. That means he really heard you.... and is following through.<br /><br />My other thought is about being submissive - I think that our submission is really our job, not theirs. It's great when they can do things that help, but we answer to God on this, so we do have to take the lead on our own attitudes. So whether its wearing skirts and dresses, or a special necklace that he's gotten you, or a reminder verse on your mirror - or even special lacy lingerie or none at all... just curling up in his lap when he's available, just search your own heart and do it. I would encourage you to ask the Duke for his thoughts - he may have some preferences too - and you may need extra help on certain days... but other than that, do what seems best to you. :)<br /><br />Hugs,<br />CaliAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-57265364540960547212013-07-24T12:30:20.377-03:002013-07-24T12:30:20.377-03:00Hi, Es May. I'm glad you sound better. It'...Hi, Es May. I'm glad you sound better. It's important to know our feelings are given weight, whether they are understood or not. I wonder why that happens?<br /><br />It's not difficult for anyone to accept and respect that we don't like a certain food even if they love it, or are repulsed by certain smells they are not bothered by. So, why is it so hard to understand we can be hurt by, or greatly moved by, certain words and actions that have no/little effect on them? <br /><br />I had a really silly comment about your bouncing baby bamboo bath brush, but I think perhaps you should heed Willie's advice - or at least proceed very cautiously. I wonder if the Dollarama brush has a strange material in the finish? Irisheyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12270910306787125881noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-85384667731552820832013-07-24T10:17:32.135-03:002013-07-24T10:17:32.135-03:00I have to confess I didn't read this entire po...I have to confess I didn't read this entire post, ( long story) BUT if that bath brush is from Dollarama THOW it out. I am not kidding. I am not trying to sound like a wife who doesn't like spankings. I am DEAD serious EsMay. That is the brush that had me severely hurt. I ended up with friction type blisters on my skin. We didn't figure it our right away. I have been a severely spanked wife for over 10 months, and NEVER have I been hurt like this. Please EsMay, don't use that bath brush if it is the one I think it is.<br /><br />williewilliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01907855123777628267noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-55421627616406758672013-07-24T06:12:32.265-03:002013-07-24T06:12:32.265-03:00Hi Es May,
This made me smile. I so glad to hear...Hi Es May,<br /><br />This made me smile. I so glad to hear you sounding happier :) It's wonderful that you were able to sit down together and have the hard conversations and came to some realisations. I agree, whether we understand why someone may be feeling hurt, or think that they should be feeling hurt, the fact that they do is the important thing.<br /><br />Glad too that you have realised what may be the cause behind you feeling so 'uneven'. Those damn hormones really do have a lot to answer for!<br /><br />Wearing dresses and skirts does make me feel more feminine and softer. Callie's right. There are a number of ways to say submissive. Concentrate on doing the little things you know he likes for example.<br /><br />Glad you suggestion got some good laughs at church. I love that someone said it's ok if you go first LoL<br /><br />Hugs,<br />RozRozhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14326826956049047973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-37589209152625144972013-07-24T05:45:30.817-03:002013-07-24T05:45:30.817-03:00I think there are many ways to stay submissive, on...I think there are many ways to stay submissive, one of which is what you wear. <br />Skirts and dresses, by far the most wonderful inventions ever made ! Honestly, not only do they make me feel more feminine but the more I wear them, the more comfortable I feel. I can only think of 4 times this month that I have worn pants...... It's winter here too. Start with dresses in bed if it makes it easier, I don't even own pj pants anymore. <br /><br />Just my thoughts though. <br /><br />CallieCalliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08722173496181331492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-75476486713182676922013-07-24T04:19:33.349-03:002013-07-24T04:19:33.349-03:00Oh those pesky hormones :( just know how horrible ...Oh those pesky hormones :( just know how horrible they can make you feel :)<br /><br />Staying in a submissive head isn't always easy, and I really don't consider myself submissive, but come to realise I'm a wife and mother, and defer to my husband if that makes sense. It's changing the mindset that helped me. Instead of wanting H to put me in that space, I just left out the word submission and put in the word WIFE. I don't know if that helps at all:)<br /><br />I love wearing dresses and skirts in the summer, it does make me feel more feminine and soft. <br /><br />Hugs babe, I hope you guys find the balance that you need xAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-86154583611770143242013-07-24T00:48:19.824-03:002013-07-24T00:48:19.824-03:00Hey Es May...I agree with Sunny...you definitely s...Hey Es May...I agree with Sunny...you definitely sound happier. I love dresses in the summer and had to buy some 'easy to get on' ones because of my arm...check out target.com...they are having a heck of a sale. Here are some of my favorites but I like long dresses: ;)<br />http://www.target.com/p/mossimo-womens-kimono-maxi-dress-assorted-colors/-/A-14248952<br />http://www.target.com/p/mossimo-women-s-maxi-dress-collection/-/A-14646626<br />http://www.target.com/p/mossimo-women-s-kimono-high-low-dress-assorted-colors/-/A-14252719<br /><br />Sending lots of positive energy that you and the Duke continue on a positive course!<br /><br />Hugs and Blessings,<br />Cat<br />Cathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14266606975978680188noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-10621499730138428392013-07-23T23:28:38.095-03:002013-07-23T23:28:38.095-03:00Duke is a good man!
MeredithDuke is a good man!<br />MeredithAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5879991995070741632.post-83501892857938507992013-07-23T23:20:42.298-03:002013-07-23T23:20:42.298-03:00You sound happier already. Sometimes, making chang...You sound happier already. Sometimes, making changes to ourselves bring changes out in others.Aimless Ramblinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00720714875762344391noreply@blogger.com