UNDER CONSTRUCTION

We had to take down all our posts for a while. We did not realize that to put them back up would repost them in everyone's feeds. We apologize for that. We also will do our best, as life allows, to get the rest of the posts up as soon as possible. :)

Sincerely, The Duke and EsMay

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Alpha Males Hated?

First of all, THANK YOU to everyone that checked in on me after my last post.  The comments, emails, and google chats were so helpful.  I won't make you blush by mentioning you by name, but you all know who you are. :)

I especially loved when you each shared your story.  I had no idea how not alone I was.  I hate that so many of us are hurting, or have hurt in the past, but I'm so glad that we can talk about it here.  {{{HUGS}}} to all of you out there that need one. :)

So, yesterday Missy admitted to wanting some good books to read.  I won't lie, I'm ALWAYS on the look out for good books.  My kindle has over 1,500 free books on it.  A lot of those though are for later in life, and a lot on parenting, children's books, recipes and so on.  But I LOVE a good clean romance book, but usually only if it has a good alpha male in it, unless it's a comedy.  But a real romance?  I want an alpha male to read about.  My friends will always tell me to read such and such a book, and know the next question I'll ask is if it has an alpha male.  Some even know now not to suggest unless it does.

For me, a book is a place to escape, and I like to escape into a world where the men know what they want, will fight to protect those they love, and who will stand up to the women if they're making mistakes, to the point of telling her what to do.  I don't want to read about a man who doesn't know if he can do this or that, wants the girl or doesn't want the girl, and is all wishy washy.  Yes, they can be unsure of the next step to take, need time to make a decision.  But being a coward, and constantly changing their minds?  NO THANK YOU.  I want to read about a man that goes after what he wants.  Knows right from wrong and doesn't waiver on it, even if it means self sacrifice. I just find that... great, sexy, endearing, what have you. :)

So I decided to look up "Christian Romance Books with Alpha Males".  It doesn't have to be Christian, I just find if I put that in when searching, I'm less likely to find books with sex scenes.  (I'm not a prude... but I have to admit I have a weakness, I have a very hard time with reading and seeing sexual stuff and it not coming up in my mind in the bedroom.  When I'm with the Duke, I want it to be him and me, not also something I remember from what I read or saw that comes up and distracts me during the moment and takes my attention off the Duke.  I know I shouldn't have this problem, but since I do, I'm very careful at what I read and watch.)  Anyway, what turned up when I was searching for a clean romance with an alpha male was disheartening.  Article after article about how ungodly alpha males in novels are, how abusive they are, and how they set women up with unrealistic expectations.

See, the romance novels I like have alpha males with real problems, they do struggle, they do make mistakes, they are human.  But they aren't abusive, and they are upright, putting the needs of others before themselves.  When did it get to be that to be an alpha male was all bad in so many eyes?  This isn't even putting DD into the equation.  Just a man that likes to lead and take care of others.  What is wrong with that?  I can understand why some people have an issue with DD, I see the misunderstanding, or what have you, but to be against alpha males altogether?  WOW.  I don't see the sense.  Men are meant to lead in certain areas of their lives, anthropologically, biblically, socially, it just seems most men feel the need to lead, to assert their masculinity, I have always found this beautiful when done in respect to those they wish to lead.  It amazes me that so many are against even the idea of an alpha male.  And some of these articles were written by men!  (Okay, so this is me being snarky, but probably men who aren't alpha males, wishing they were.)

Or maybe its just me, maybe I have the idea of an alpha male all wrong?  Which, if I do, please feel free to correct me. :)

So anyway, I keep up my search for books with good alpha males, without sex scenes, and maybe some DD ones thrown in.  I admit, after reading the talk around Missy's question for good books, I finally got a blushing book yesterday, the one that is free right now.  It did say one to two sentences about a sex scene, but that was it, and that was great.  I was worried I'd have to put the book down, but it surprised me by ending there, and I was very thankful. :)

12 comments:

  1. I've not read them but Patty is known for writing good DD books without a lot of sex.

    http://www.pattydevlin.com

    Callie

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    1. Thank you, Callie. :) I'll look into those. :)

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  2. "Men are meant to lead in certain areas of their lives..." Love this.
    Great post!!!

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    1. Thank you, glad you liked. :)

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  3. I love to read too but am having trouble finding good books. I read other stuff than romance novels but I'm not against them in general. I do prefer the guy to have most of his thoughts in order. I guess I can empathize with a woman in a book if she feels wishy washy but throwing the guy's wishy washyness in on top of that just distracts me. Yes, I believe that is what I was trying to say.

    I am a writer. I write a lot of non fiction but fiction also. The books that I have about couples are all alpha male related in some fashion. I didn't realize I did that but I guess it is easy for me to write that way because the dynamic is more fluid.

    If you can find some good, clean books, let me know. I'm always dying for something to ready but too afraid to look because there are many many images that I just don't want in my head.

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    1. I will definitely let you know. :) I write too. My friends have been after me to publish this one certain book now for years... so I've finally decided to get an agent. Looking at them now... a bit terrified. :) This male lead is the only non alpha male I've ever written, might be why it's the book they want me to publish. LOL Well he is a bit... but not a lot.

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  4. Hi Esmay

    It's not easy to find a book that really captures you , but I've just started reading Saoirse books, reluctant consent and it's GREAT, not too steamy but it enough to bring that alpha male over, it's a must read ;)

    Also June has been kind enough to sen me some books which I can't wait to start :)

    Happy reading my friend x

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    1. Missy, thank you. :) If you find something good in your travels, let me know. And I'll look at the Saoirse books. :) I've decided I'm going to try to write a few myself, just for my own entertainment. I have two stories I was writing before with alpha males, but wasn't far into writing them, and one of them especially would be a great DD story. :) He already is a DD type man in attitude, so it wouldn't be hard to add it in. I won't ever publish it, but it would be fun to have to read again at another time. :)

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  5. Hi Es May,

    It sounds as though we have similar thoughts on what we want in an alpha male lead :) However, I don't like it when the alpha part is too over the top and unrealistic.

    Good luck with your search. If you find some good clean books, let us know :)

    Hugs,
    Roz

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    1. I totally agree, Roz. :) I want them to be believable, real, but strong. :) And I will be sure to share if I find any good books. :)

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  6. Great post Es! It is so true that society seems to afraid of offending anybody that they have gone the other way and do not want to see or hear about Alpha type males leading in relationships. Looking forward to your next post.

    The Duke

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    1. Thanks for writing, Sweetie. :)

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