UNDER CONSTRUCTION

We had to take down all our posts for a while. We did not realize that to put them back up would repost them in everyone's feeds. We apologize for that. We also will do our best, as life allows, to get the rest of the posts up as soon as possible. :)

Sincerely, The Duke and EsMay

Friday, February 01, 2013

Open Mouth, Missing Brain - OOOPS

Note to self.  When you look online with your husband for a paddle because you can't find one in town, be careful what you do and say!

We were looking at paddles last night, we have been debating back and forth if we should have one or not, and some of the sites in the States charge more for shipping than the item itself.  So I've been looking at Canadian sites, and finally found one yesterday that is verified and reasonable priced.

I was showing my husband the 12 inch and 16 inch paddles.  He said he thought that the 12' ones would be way too short, and maybe even the 16'.  Sooooo, stupid NON THINKING me said I'd get a ruler and let him see how long it actually is.  Yep, you read that right.  So I went to my craft supplies and went to my scrapbooking bags and pulled out my favourite ruler.  It's plastic/rubber blend and I just love it.  It's the best ruler I've ever found for staying put on scrapbook paper when needing to draw lines and such.  So I took it out to show him how long it was.

He was still unconvinced.  So here is where I lost my brain again.  I told him he could give it a try out for five swats to see if it seemed long enough to him.  REALLY!?!?!  Where had all cognisant thought flown to???

So he instructed me to lean over the futon.  I thought he'd just do a few trial swings.  You know what assuming does... right?  In one swoop down came all my layers of padding.  And without warning *SNAP*  REALLY!?!  No warm up?  I stood back up and told him what I thought of that... er... or course I did this nicely... *er maybe not so much*  Okay, I wasn't rude, but I wasn't miss submissive either.

I got the five spanks alright, followed by more because he really liked the feel of the ruler.  I did not expect it to sting so much, but it is one good heavy duty ruler, I should have expected it!  Then I couldn't believe his words as I was fighting to stay in place.  "FOOT DOWN!"  Wow, where did this authoratative person come from?  And who let him in the house???  Oh woops, that was me!  And I not only let him in, I INVITED him.  WOOPS.  Doesn't anyone warn you that when you enter DD your brain will not always be involved in the words you speak???  lol

Let's just say my husband was very pleased with the ruler and told me to add it to our arsenal  collection of spanking items.  We had a great connection time afterwards. :)

So I guess we now have a ruler in our collection... now what am I going to do for scrapbooking if I can't find a good rubber edged ruler that will stay in place on the page? :(  He better hope I can find another one... er... I guess that's... I better hope I can.  :)

Oh, and in the end, he agrees, anything longer than the 16' paddles would be a flat out weapon.  So glad he didn't make me look at the 18' and 20' ones!

14 comments:

  1. I'm sorry, Es May, had to grin :) Of course you let him in, and doesn't it feel lovely and safe and warm and ....home?

    (hugs)))

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    1. Yeah... just... he's enjoying it way too much! ;) ;)

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  2. Es May,
    OUCH! That ruler sounds bad. And yes, what are you going to use for scrap booking now?

    We have a 16 in paddle (picture is on my most recent post) and it is
    A-W-F-U-L!! I want to break it every night now. I wouldn't do that tho, no way ;) And I'm the idiot that bought it. It does what it's supposed to do though so I recommend it as a good one.

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    1. It wasn't horrible, but rubber and pastic together to pack quite a punch to them when used as a weapon... er, impliment. lol I'll have to tell my husband what you said about the 16' paddle. :) And that you recommend it... though... maybe for the safety of my backside I maybe should keep it a secret. lol

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  3. Oh lol EsMay
    When I read you went to get the ruler, I was shouting at phone NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    Again all I can say is we live and learn.
    We also have a ruler, a heavy wooden one and it's not FUN x

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    1. OH! That's who I heard screaming! Was trying to figure that out. ;) I'll have to make sure we get no heavy wooden rulers! :) Ours is rubber and plastic, thank goodness, though we did pick up some paint stirrers... I'm guessing they pack the same punch. Owie.

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  4. Oh I didn't know you were Canadian! Yay!!! Um, would you mind emailing me the name of the site you were on? We are having a hard time finding things too... wilma.barney@gmail.com Or even better yet put it on the old blog here!

    Willie

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    1. Yep, born and bred. :) You're in Canada too? :) I can certainly get that site and email it to you. I'll just go into my history from yesterday and send it off to you. :)

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  5. Thats exactly why I never shop for or offer implement suggestions...LOL. Glad your connection time afterwards was nice.

    What about Blondie's paddles on Etsy? Have you looked at them ?

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    1. I had never heard of them, so I just went on now. Have you ever bought from there? I just wrote her to see what shipping to Canada would be. :) Thank you for that suggestion. :)

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  6. I'm with Christina! If MM wants a new paddle...he's on his own!

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    1. Hahaha, I'm afraid to admit this... but I'm actually the one that wants the paddle. To me... a paddle is scary, it wields power, it shows that person is in charge. I feel that if we were to have a paddle, it will help even more in my head to accept my submission. The other implements we have are normal house hold items, and so to me, are just used for correction, but I feel no role shown through them. But the idea of a paddle? That really makes me stand up at attention... yeah, I might be crazy. Might need to get my brain checked on this one. lol

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  7. Okay, that ruler sounds ouchy! Good luck with the paddle shopping! Michael mentions getting a lexan paddle from time to time, but thankfully he hasn't actually ordered one...yet. Wood is bad enough in my opinion! I hope you can find another good ruler for scrapbooking!

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    1. OH GRACE!!! I cannot even begin to imagine a lexan paddle! My bottom aches for you just at the thought! Thank you, my husband read my post and felt so bad that he says we'll be going looking for a new one soon to replace mine. Notice he didn't say he'd be giving mine back! lol

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